As many are aware, I have not been able to update Immortal Music and Music = Life as I once hoped due to techincal difficulties. Luckily, we now have a new compuer, which is what I am currently using. All the information, such as my Photoshop, will be removed from the old computer and placed onto the new one within the next couple of days. So, I will be able to change Immortal Music's layout, make a new profile picture for Music = Life and make the planned graphics.
I am hoping to get back on track with all the plans I talked about for the new year, but there is one slight problem. My website does not enjoy letting me do the things I want to. Last night for instance, I attempted to actually post the news for the first time in about a month. There's a lot going on, big tours and a few releases, so I felt like I should talk about it. I tried to, and got about half of it posted, and then the stupid website stopped responding and refused to let me click in the text box to type up everything.
Now, that does bring me to an idea, I could either try to find yet another website for myself, or I could post the news on the blog here. Another option is I just keep attempting to post things on the site, due to the fact that I do not want to have to find another site since I do send my links to managers and management companies, and I'd rather they have the correct link. I also do not like the idea of using the blog as the news section because I feel the blog should be for my random rants and all that, and it is unprofessional to have a section on your site, and never use it for what its actually for.
So, I do believe I am going to attempt to just keep posting things. Hopefully, it'll behave and allow me to do so. I also think I may re-work all the plans I had, just because those didn't seem to be interesting anyone. I think I'll sit down with the plans later today and see what else I could come up with.
Are you guys happy that I'm going to try to pick up my plans again, or do you guys not really care? Leave a comment on the link to this blog on the Facebook page telling me what you think. Also, leave any suggestions or feedback there too. I seriously want more activity.
Tuesday, January 31, 2012
Monday, January 30, 2012
Who I Am
Who am I? Well, who are you? Who's asking, and why do you want to know? I'm one of those people, the ones who won't hesitate to ask questions, and generally won't stop until a logical answer has been recieved.
To some I am just a kid, even though I will be nineteen this year, but I see myself as much more than that. I am who I am, and I know that. Nothing, and no one will ever change that. "I don't care what you think, as long as it's about me." That line as said by Fall Out Boy in 2008, and while it sounds a little concieded, all it means is, no matter what someone thinks about you, they're still wasting their time thinking about you.You're being thought of, and that can do a lot. Another way to put it is, "Haters make me famous." Blood On The Dance Floor, and probably many others have said that.
I'm quoting these bands because music is my life, and many of you know that. I can think of so many quotes just off of the top of my head that fit me so well. "I am who I am, I can't help myself, and if you don't like it, get with somebody else. I'll never change my ways, its not a phase. This is how it is, and this is how its going to stay.". "I tear my heart open, I sew myself shut, my weakness is that I care too much"...I could seriously go on for hours with just song quotes alone, but since that'll probably never end, I won't get into that.
Sure there is more to me than music, but that's a huge factor in my life. I decided I wanted to type this up because I was on Hot Topic's website, looking at band T-shirts like I always do, while listening to "New Religion" by Black Veil Brides. While I think BVB ment they'd be the "new religion", I think it should be music. It probably never will be, but I seriously feel it should be. I have read that listening to music can actually change your view on the world, depending on what you listen to, and any kind of music can heal pain. It also can bring thousands of people together, and even just for a night, that might just make someone's world feel at peace.
You wanna know who I am? I'm one of those kids that all the bible thumpers out there would take one look at and assume I was a devil worshipper. I'm the one who wears a lot of black eye makeup, band t-shirts, paints my fingernails black, will wear Tripp pants with the chains and all, with my phone in one hand, iPod in the other, with purple in my hair, and fingerless gloves on my hand. I don't have any "abnormal" pericings, but I want my lip, my tongue and my bellybutton pierced, I also want a tattoo. Its people like me that these little old ladies who go around saying, "Praise The Lord", would take one look at and get a disgusted look on their face.
I'm the girl who'll one minute be rocking out to Asking Alexandria, and let my iPod switch to the Jonas Brothers or Hilary Duff. I just don't care, and why should I? I have fun with it, so why avoid it? There's so many things in life that people are told not to do, because its "not allowed". Well, I say, who says? Sure, there are some things you really should never do, like immoral things, but that's just common sense. There's no rules for how you dress with me, as long as you like it, and you're not going to get arrested for indecent exposer, you're good.
My "style" can be classifed as "emo", or sometimes "goth". I show my love for music and "dark" style daily. I rarely wear something is not a band t-shirt, and if I am, its something else that's "emo", or darker at least. Put it this way, here's a few of my favorite shirts: A Black Veil Brides shirt, a Falling In Reverse Shirt, my Three Days Grace Shirt, my Escape The Fate shirt, a shirt that says "Music Is My Boyfriend", and another that says, "I may be cute, but I still bite." I also love my Tripp band jeans, my actual Tripps, my Tripp skirt, and my Abbey Dawn skinny jeans. I rarely get to wear them, because I live in Hell (Florida, its hot enough to be Hell, most of the year.), but I sitll love them.
I am the kind of girl that will turn on a song just to see if I can still bear it, and sometimes regret it because it'll bring back a memory that stings. If I say something, I mean it, I'm straight forward about things, and try to be fearless, even though I have fears that do hold me back from time to time. I'm not afraid of the future, I wish it'd get here sooner.
When I say I don't care, I usually don't, because if I do care, I make it clear. I am "maturally immature.", which means I know when to be mature and when I don't nessicarily have to be. Meaning, I'll be the one who takes control of situations when need be, but I will also take much enjoyment out of bounce houses, and watching kids shows like Wizards Of Waverly Place and iCarly. I'm not afraid of what anyone will say, honestly, I'm not. I am who I am, because that's who I want to be. If someone can't accept that, they can get out of my life. They don't have to be around someone they don't like.
Over all, I am a nice, kind hearted person, but once you've crossed me, usually you're going to be treated differently. I do give out second chances, but only when I feel they're needed. You have to take the bad with the good in order to appericate the good.
I hate poltics, religion annoys me, and anyone who pushes such things on me, tends to get on my nerves.
You don't have to be afraid to put your dream in action. You probably recongize that quote, right? That's because its from the Victorious theme song, "Make It Shine." I feel its true, so who cares if its from a kids show theme song? You don't have to be afraid to put your dreams in action, just go for it. In the end, it'll either work out, or you'll decide its not your dream.
This totally went off topic, but maybe it didn't at the same time. I'm not sure even why I fully decided to do this..
To some I am just a kid, even though I will be nineteen this year, but I see myself as much more than that. I am who I am, and I know that. Nothing, and no one will ever change that. "I don't care what you think, as long as it's about me." That line as said by Fall Out Boy in 2008, and while it sounds a little concieded, all it means is, no matter what someone thinks about you, they're still wasting their time thinking about you.You're being thought of, and that can do a lot. Another way to put it is, "Haters make me famous." Blood On The Dance Floor, and probably many others have said that.
I'm quoting these bands because music is my life, and many of you know that. I can think of so many quotes just off of the top of my head that fit me so well. "I am who I am, I can't help myself, and if you don't like it, get with somebody else. I'll never change my ways, its not a phase. This is how it is, and this is how its going to stay.". "I tear my heart open, I sew myself shut, my weakness is that I care too much"...I could seriously go on for hours with just song quotes alone, but since that'll probably never end, I won't get into that.
Sure there is more to me than music, but that's a huge factor in my life. I decided I wanted to type this up because I was on Hot Topic's website, looking at band T-shirts like I always do, while listening to "New Religion" by Black Veil Brides. While I think BVB ment they'd be the "new religion", I think it should be music. It probably never will be, but I seriously feel it should be. I have read that listening to music can actually change your view on the world, depending on what you listen to, and any kind of music can heal pain. It also can bring thousands of people together, and even just for a night, that might just make someone's world feel at peace.
You wanna know who I am? I'm one of those kids that all the bible thumpers out there would take one look at and assume I was a devil worshipper. I'm the one who wears a lot of black eye makeup, band t-shirts, paints my fingernails black, will wear Tripp pants with the chains and all, with my phone in one hand, iPod in the other, with purple in my hair, and fingerless gloves on my hand. I don't have any "abnormal" pericings, but I want my lip, my tongue and my bellybutton pierced, I also want a tattoo. Its people like me that these little old ladies who go around saying, "Praise The Lord", would take one look at and get a disgusted look on their face.
I'm the girl who'll one minute be rocking out to Asking Alexandria, and let my iPod switch to the Jonas Brothers or Hilary Duff. I just don't care, and why should I? I have fun with it, so why avoid it? There's so many things in life that people are told not to do, because its "not allowed". Well, I say, who says? Sure, there are some things you really should never do, like immoral things, but that's just common sense. There's no rules for how you dress with me, as long as you like it, and you're not going to get arrested for indecent exposer, you're good.
My "style" can be classifed as "emo", or sometimes "goth". I show my love for music and "dark" style daily. I rarely wear something is not a band t-shirt, and if I am, its something else that's "emo", or darker at least. Put it this way, here's a few of my favorite shirts: A Black Veil Brides shirt, a Falling In Reverse Shirt, my Three Days Grace Shirt, my Escape The Fate shirt, a shirt that says "Music Is My Boyfriend", and another that says, "I may be cute, but I still bite." I also love my Tripp band jeans, my actual Tripps, my Tripp skirt, and my Abbey Dawn skinny jeans. I rarely get to wear them, because I live in Hell (Florida, its hot enough to be Hell, most of the year.), but I sitll love them.
I am the kind of girl that will turn on a song just to see if I can still bear it, and sometimes regret it because it'll bring back a memory that stings. If I say something, I mean it, I'm straight forward about things, and try to be fearless, even though I have fears that do hold me back from time to time. I'm not afraid of the future, I wish it'd get here sooner.
When I say I don't care, I usually don't, because if I do care, I make it clear. I am "maturally immature.", which means I know when to be mature and when I don't nessicarily have to be. Meaning, I'll be the one who takes control of situations when need be, but I will also take much enjoyment out of bounce houses, and watching kids shows like Wizards Of Waverly Place and iCarly. I'm not afraid of what anyone will say, honestly, I'm not. I am who I am, because that's who I want to be. If someone can't accept that, they can get out of my life. They don't have to be around someone they don't like.
Over all, I am a nice, kind hearted person, but once you've crossed me, usually you're going to be treated differently. I do give out second chances, but only when I feel they're needed. You have to take the bad with the good in order to appericate the good.
I hate poltics, religion annoys me, and anyone who pushes such things on me, tends to get on my nerves.
You don't have to be afraid to put your dream in action. You probably recongize that quote, right? That's because its from the Victorious theme song, "Make It Shine." I feel its true, so who cares if its from a kids show theme song? You don't have to be afraid to put your dreams in action, just go for it. In the end, it'll either work out, or you'll decide its not your dream.
This totally went off topic, but maybe it didn't at the same time. I'm not sure even why I fully decided to do this..
Sunday, January 29, 2012
A dream I had last night... (BVB fans will wanna read it)
Last night, I had a dream that I got to interview Ashley Purdy from Black Veil Brides. I am not sure where the rest of the guys were, I saw Jake and Jinxx and few times, but they didn't ever say anything to me, and I never saw CC or Andy, though Andy called Ashley a few times to say he was on his way. I have no idea where he was, or for that matter where I was with Ashley.
It appeared to be a trailer, or as others may know it, a motor home. It wasn't moving, and it was defentily not their bus, but that's where I was invited to do the interview. I get there, and their manager told me to just go on into the house. He said that he thought Ashley was awake, but he wasn't sure about the others.
So I walk inside, and sure enough, right there in the kitchen sat a shirtless Ashley. For some reason, instead of just saying "Hi." or introducing myself, I asked him if he even owns a shirt. Not sure why, but luckily he just laughed it off and said yes, but he didn't want to wear it.
We hung out for a while, sort of doing our interview, but mostly talking. The others walked through a few times and said hi to Ashley, and Andy called apologizing for not being there for the interview. It was never explained where he was, but he said he'd meet us at the venue.
I piled into the car with the rest of BVB and go to the venue. They're doing soundcheck and all that, I'm still talking mainly to Ashley, and taking pictures of them doing soundcheck.
What sucks is I woke up right as Andy walked in! I didn't even see him, I just heard him say, "Sorry, I'm late."
Cool dream though. :)
It appeared to be a trailer, or as others may know it, a motor home. It wasn't moving, and it was defentily not their bus, but that's where I was invited to do the interview. I get there, and their manager told me to just go on into the house. He said that he thought Ashley was awake, but he wasn't sure about the others.
So I walk inside, and sure enough, right there in the kitchen sat a shirtless Ashley. For some reason, instead of just saying "Hi." or introducing myself, I asked him if he even owns a shirt. Not sure why, but luckily he just laughed it off and said yes, but he didn't want to wear it.
We hung out for a while, sort of doing our interview, but mostly talking. The others walked through a few times and said hi to Ashley, and Andy called apologizing for not being there for the interview. It was never explained where he was, but he said he'd meet us at the venue.
I piled into the car with the rest of BVB and go to the venue. They're doing soundcheck and all that, I'm still talking mainly to Ashley, and taking pictures of them doing soundcheck.
What sucks is I woke up right as Andy walked in! I didn't even see him, I just heard him say, "Sorry, I'm late."
Cool dream though. :)
Wednesday, January 25, 2012
Songs to listen to while in church
I saw a hashtag thing that said, "#SongsToListenToInChurch" or something close to it, thanks to Bryan Stars and had to share it. If you do not know what a 'hashtag' is, not only is it a funny word, but it is commonly used on Twitter for...well, I don't really know why, they just are. Now where I found this was on Facebook, I have not signed into Twitter yet, but knowing Bryan Stars, its probably posted on there as well. He posted a few good ones like, "Love Like Woe" by The Ready Set, and "God Bless You" by Black Veil Brides, but now, I wanna do some of my own.
I've actually thought about this several times because I actually really dislike going to church. I find it to be boring, and sometimes down right annoying. Not to mention, the music they generally play is all this old, Christian-y, annoying songs that all basically just say "Praise the Lord." I tend to be the one sitting there thinking, "Ok, why can't you play something good? You can keep it Christian, but play somg Flyleaf, Skillet, or Underoath, Something that is techincally 'Christian' music, but its not so damn obvious." Some of the songs I have listed below fit, and others do not at all. Check it out.
Note: Some songs actually have explainations, just because. You will probably see a pattern, for the most part. The majority of the songs I have chosen have "an "empowering" feel to them.
Songs To Listen To While In Church:
"Time For Me To Fly" -The Jonas Brothers (first verison, or second verison works.)
"When You Look Me In The Eyes" -Jonas Brothers (The reason for this is because, while it is a love song, I have often wondered if it was actually written to be a religous song, since it was written by Nick Jonas as an eleven year old boy, with the assistance of his father. No eleven year old, even with help, would not be able to have the life experience to write such a beautiful love song. At 11, generally the closest to 'love' you get, is a really strong crush.)
"New Religion" -Black Veil Brides (Well, this one is probably not a good idea, but it'd amuse me if it was played in a church. I get the feeling that its anti religon, partly due to Andy's little speech at the end:
"We are the unholy,
We are the bastard sons of your media culture.
Our minds, and eyes, and bodies were born of your exclusion
An illusion you hide behind
You don't love a God, you love your comfort!
To you we are filth, we are dirty, so be it.
We are dirty and unclean, a congregation of the unseen
Together we will set this world on fire!
This is the new religion,
Amen!"
Its probably my favorite part of the song, for a few reasons. Mostly being, I agree with the part that says, "You don't love a God, you love your comfort. To you we are filth, we are dirty, so be it. We are dirty, and unclean, a congregation of the unseen." I feel a lot of Christians look down on anyone who doesn't fully believe in their God. Not nessicarily a God, their particular one. I feel that's not right, and when I'm totally honest, I'm not certain I believe in any kind of a God. I've said this before, but musicians are my Gods, concerts are my church and music is my religion.
Anyways, back on topic, and off of my explaination of why I dislike religion.
"I will Be There" -Art Of Dying
People are always saying, "God will be there for yo in your worst moments.", and this song says, "I will be there, when nothing works, and no one cares." So it feels fitting.
"Breathe Again." -Art of Dying
'God' is supposed to make you feel enlightened and all that shit, and this song says, "I don't know how, I don't know how, I don't know when, but I can finally breathe again." I've heard some Christians say feeling enlightened by God is like being able to breathe easier. I don't understand it, but this song really does make sense.
"Best I Can" -Art Of Dying
If all this Christian music made me feel better like its "supposed" to, maybe I'd actually like it more. This one is perfect because I feel it could touch the hearts of everyone. It has so many lines I feel everyone could relate to, "Tonight I feel like the world won't miss me, so much to say, but there's no one listening. If we're alone, are we all together in that?","
"World Around Me" -Escape The Fate
"I don't wanna be demanding. I just wanna know the reasons why we live and die in a world of lies" Who hasn't questioned that? I mean come on, its a vaild question with no answer. Maybe if it was played in church and discussed someone could come up with a reason.
"Someone's Watching Over Me" -Hilary Duff.
Ok, so this one is actually a religion song, I am almost certain of that, but I love it. Its a beautiful song, and I've loved it since it came out in 2004.
"Who I Am" -Nick Jonas And The Administration
"I want someone to love me, for who I am. I want someone to need me, is that so bad? I wanna break all the madness, but its all I have. I want someone to love me, for who I am." Everyone wants to be loved for who they are, not what they do, or what they're not. It'd be a good song to play because everyone there could relate.
"Savin' Me" -Nickelback.
This one is actually a religious song. I hadn't realized it until my youth group randomly started playing the music video. Its just a pretty song, that's why I like it and feel more church's should play it.
"If Today Was Your Last Day" -Nickelback
I feel this song could really encourage people to do something with their lives, not just waste their days never making a difference. "If today was your last day, and tomorrow was too late, could you say goodbye to yesterday? Would you live each moment like your last, leave old pictures in the past?" Its basically saying, you never know when your time is up, so why live in the past when you could be living now.
"No Matter What" -Papa Roach
"No matter what, I've got your back." It might give people a little hope that they're not alone, that someone will be there eventually.
"Astronaut" -Simple Plan
Everyone has felt alone at some point, and that's what this song is actually all about. "'Cause tonight I feel like an astronaut, sending S.O.S from this tiny box. And I lost all signal when I lifted off, now I'm stuck out here and the world forgot." I had never thought of being alone as being like an astronaut, but it makes sense. I feel like if people heard this, espeically as a group, maybe it'd repair the way people view the world.
"Lost In You" -Three Days Grace
"Somehow I found a way to get lost in you, let me inside, let me get close to you." Its just a beautiful song.
There's more, but I don't have a lot of time left to do this. Basically, I feel that 'church songs' should be heartfelt and actually mean something to everyone. That is why I say concerts are my church. They'll play songs from time to time that will touch the hearts and souls of nearly every person in the room. Its just an incredible thing to me, and sometimes I feel like I'd enjoy church way more if it was all about the music, and if the music wasn't all about praising some unseen Lord.
I've actually thought about this several times because I actually really dislike going to church. I find it to be boring, and sometimes down right annoying. Not to mention, the music they generally play is all this old, Christian-y, annoying songs that all basically just say "Praise the Lord." I tend to be the one sitting there thinking, "Ok, why can't you play something good? You can keep it Christian, but play somg Flyleaf, Skillet, or Underoath, Something that is techincally 'Christian' music, but its not so damn obvious." Some of the songs I have listed below fit, and others do not at all. Check it out.
Note: Some songs actually have explainations, just because. You will probably see a pattern, for the most part. The majority of the songs I have chosen have "an "empowering" feel to them.
Songs To Listen To While In Church:
"Time For Me To Fly" -The Jonas Brothers (first verison, or second verison works.)
"When You Look Me In The Eyes" -Jonas Brothers (The reason for this is because, while it is a love song, I have often wondered if it was actually written to be a religous song, since it was written by Nick Jonas as an eleven year old boy, with the assistance of his father. No eleven year old, even with help, would not be able to have the life experience to write such a beautiful love song. At 11, generally the closest to 'love' you get, is a really strong crush.)
"New Religion" -Black Veil Brides (Well, this one is probably not a good idea, but it'd amuse me if it was played in a church. I get the feeling that its anti religon, partly due to Andy's little speech at the end:
"We are the unholy,
We are the bastard sons of your media culture.
Our minds, and eyes, and bodies were born of your exclusion
An illusion you hide behind
You don't love a God, you love your comfort!
To you we are filth, we are dirty, so be it.
We are dirty and unclean, a congregation of the unseen
Together we will set this world on fire!
This is the new religion,
Amen!"
Its probably my favorite part of the song, for a few reasons. Mostly being, I agree with the part that says, "You don't love a God, you love your comfort. To you we are filth, we are dirty, so be it. We are dirty, and unclean, a congregation of the unseen." I feel a lot of Christians look down on anyone who doesn't fully believe in their God. Not nessicarily a God, their particular one. I feel that's not right, and when I'm totally honest, I'm not certain I believe in any kind of a God. I've said this before, but musicians are my Gods, concerts are my church and music is my religion.
Anyways, back on topic, and off of my explaination of why I dislike religion.
"I will Be There" -Art Of Dying
People are always saying, "God will be there for yo in your worst moments.", and this song says, "I will be there, when nothing works, and no one cares." So it feels fitting.
"Breathe Again." -Art of Dying
'God' is supposed to make you feel enlightened and all that shit, and this song says, "I don't know how, I don't know how, I don't know when, but I can finally breathe again." I've heard some Christians say feeling enlightened by God is like being able to breathe easier. I don't understand it, but this song really does make sense.
"Best I Can" -Art Of Dying
If all this Christian music made me feel better like its "supposed" to, maybe I'd actually like it more. This one is perfect because I feel it could touch the hearts of everyone. It has so many lines I feel everyone could relate to, "Tonight I feel like the world won't miss me, so much to say, but there's no one listening. If we're alone, are we all together in that?","
"World Around Me" -Escape The Fate
"I don't wanna be demanding. I just wanna know the reasons why we live and die in a world of lies" Who hasn't questioned that? I mean come on, its a vaild question with no answer. Maybe if it was played in church and discussed someone could come up with a reason.
"Someone's Watching Over Me" -Hilary Duff.
Ok, so this one is actually a religion song, I am almost certain of that, but I love it. Its a beautiful song, and I've loved it since it came out in 2004.
"Who I Am" -Nick Jonas And The Administration
"I want someone to love me, for who I am. I want someone to need me, is that so bad? I wanna break all the madness, but its all I have. I want someone to love me, for who I am." Everyone wants to be loved for who they are, not what they do, or what they're not. It'd be a good song to play because everyone there could relate.
"Savin' Me" -Nickelback.
This one is actually a religious song. I hadn't realized it until my youth group randomly started playing the music video. Its just a pretty song, that's why I like it and feel more church's should play it.
"If Today Was Your Last Day" -Nickelback
I feel this song could really encourage people to do something with their lives, not just waste their days never making a difference. "If today was your last day, and tomorrow was too late, could you say goodbye to yesterday? Would you live each moment like your last, leave old pictures in the past?" Its basically saying, you never know when your time is up, so why live in the past when you could be living now.
"No Matter What" -Papa Roach
"No matter what, I've got your back." It might give people a little hope that they're not alone, that someone will be there eventually.
"Astronaut" -Simple Plan
Everyone has felt alone at some point, and that's what this song is actually all about. "'Cause tonight I feel like an astronaut, sending S.O.S from this tiny box. And I lost all signal when I lifted off, now I'm stuck out here and the world forgot." I had never thought of being alone as being like an astronaut, but it makes sense. I feel like if people heard this, espeically as a group, maybe it'd repair the way people view the world.
"Lost In You" -Three Days Grace
"Somehow I found a way to get lost in you, let me inside, let me get close to you." Its just a beautiful song.
There's more, but I don't have a lot of time left to do this. Basically, I feel that 'church songs' should be heartfelt and actually mean something to everyone. That is why I say concerts are my church. They'll play songs from time to time that will touch the hearts and souls of nearly every person in the room. Its just an incredible thing to me, and sometimes I feel like I'd enjoy church way more if it was all about the music, and if the music wasn't all about praising some unseen Lord.
Tuesday, January 24, 2012
I hate my brother
Ok, so I think I've mentioned this before, but I am a twin. My brother and I are vastly different, but no matter what I do, he seems to think he's some awesome being that can do no wrong, but whatever I do is wrong. He's an immature little brat! We're 18 fucking years old and he acts like he's about ten years old. I can not say anything negative about him or else he's going, "Well you do this.." or "You do that." Grow the fuck up! Just now I told him he acts like a fucking ten year old (I'm pissed, can you tell?), and he stormed out of the room and yelled, "Fuck You" to me! I didn't do anything wrong, stop ignoring when people say things negative about you and learn from it!
Even our own mother has said he acts like a little kid, almost daily she tells him to grow up. All he ever wants to do is watch anime, and play video games. He doesn't do anything else for the most part, and he attempts to make me feel bad whenever I do anything good. Like I apply for a few jobs and mention it, he goes on and on about the fact that "I make him feel bad for not bothering when I do things." Stop trying to bring me down, you fucking asshole, and just step up! I get so sick of it! Basically anything annoying he could do, he does.
Oh, and he gets pissy over everything. In that instance, he's like my father. I'm getting so fed up that I'm about ready to disown him as my brother. What's driving me crazy is we live in the same house, and have mostly all the same friends. We are never apart. Its gotten so bad lately that we even argue in front of our friends because a coment will get made and he's like "Well you do the same thing." When half of the time, I don't. When I say I'm getting sick of hearing that as his argument every single time, he just says, "Well, I'm getting sick of you doing this every single time." How about actually stop! Grow up and stop being such a fucking baby! You're 18 years old, face life and grow the fuck up!
He seems to find anything to get pissed about, and then promptly decides to yell at me about it. At least my Dad tends to say out of my fucking way now as long as I stay out of his. We don't talk unless we have to most of the time, just because we don't want the drama that generally comes with us talking. Its fucking annoying and I hate it. My brother just decides to be all over anything I do, good or bad and finds the negative in it, and if its about him, he just gets pissed. I hate it! Its become a daily occurance and I don't get it. He just PISSES ME THE FUCK OFF! I'm dead serious, plus he likes to hover over me like he needs to watch over me, and what he doesn't realize is Mom tends to put me in charge of him. She'll tell me to help him out and all that just because he will basically give himself a panic attack if he doesn't know how to do something, he doesn't listen, so there's very little he'll know how to do when it comes to adult things, and he often does not use any common sense. I'm not even just being mean when I say he acts like a ten year old. My friend has a ten year old brother, and they have a ton in common, and it seems to be we both agree that our brothers do the same things wrong a lot.
I fucking hate this. I'm seriously thinking I may just give him the silent treatment for a week or two, just to give myself a damn break. Plus, I need to make some friends that I do not share with him! We've been a package deal our entire lives and its really beginning to aggravate me greatly. We're two seperate people, with major differences, why can't we ever be apart?! Quite litterally, the only time it feels like we're apart anymore is when I go to the grocery store with my Mom. That's it! Generally our grocery shopping only takes an hour to two hours, and that's not enough. Maybe I should see if I can go and spend an entire weekend with a friend or something. Quite frankly, the only one I like in my house is my mother. I feel horrible saying that, but its the truth.
Even our own mother has said he acts like a little kid, almost daily she tells him to grow up. All he ever wants to do is watch anime, and play video games. He doesn't do anything else for the most part, and he attempts to make me feel bad whenever I do anything good. Like I apply for a few jobs and mention it, he goes on and on about the fact that "I make him feel bad for not bothering when I do things." Stop trying to bring me down, you fucking asshole, and just step up! I get so sick of it! Basically anything annoying he could do, he does.
Oh, and he gets pissy over everything. In that instance, he's like my father. I'm getting so fed up that I'm about ready to disown him as my brother. What's driving me crazy is we live in the same house, and have mostly all the same friends. We are never apart. Its gotten so bad lately that we even argue in front of our friends because a coment will get made and he's like "Well you do the same thing." When half of the time, I don't. When I say I'm getting sick of hearing that as his argument every single time, he just says, "Well, I'm getting sick of you doing this every single time." How about actually stop! Grow up and stop being such a fucking baby! You're 18 years old, face life and grow the fuck up!
He seems to find anything to get pissed about, and then promptly decides to yell at me about it. At least my Dad tends to say out of my fucking way now as long as I stay out of his. We don't talk unless we have to most of the time, just because we don't want the drama that generally comes with us talking. Its fucking annoying and I hate it. My brother just decides to be all over anything I do, good or bad and finds the negative in it, and if its about him, he just gets pissed. I hate it! Its become a daily occurance and I don't get it. He just PISSES ME THE FUCK OFF! I'm dead serious, plus he likes to hover over me like he needs to watch over me, and what he doesn't realize is Mom tends to put me in charge of him. She'll tell me to help him out and all that just because he will basically give himself a panic attack if he doesn't know how to do something, he doesn't listen, so there's very little he'll know how to do when it comes to adult things, and he often does not use any common sense. I'm not even just being mean when I say he acts like a ten year old. My friend has a ten year old brother, and they have a ton in common, and it seems to be we both agree that our brothers do the same things wrong a lot.
I fucking hate this. I'm seriously thinking I may just give him the silent treatment for a week or two, just to give myself a damn break. Plus, I need to make some friends that I do not share with him! We've been a package deal our entire lives and its really beginning to aggravate me greatly. We're two seperate people, with major differences, why can't we ever be apart?! Quite litterally, the only time it feels like we're apart anymore is when I go to the grocery store with my Mom. That's it! Generally our grocery shopping only takes an hour to two hours, and that's not enough. Maybe I should see if I can go and spend an entire weekend with a friend or something. Quite frankly, the only one I like in my house is my mother. I feel horrible saying that, but its the truth.
Saturday, January 21, 2012
Confession (BVB fans need to read this)
I've made a comparrison several times of the Black Veil Brides fans to Jonas Brothers fans, but recently I've been seeing some very disturbing things. You love them, right? Some of these fans are taking their love too far, by stealing sunglasses and scratching them. Dude, be careful, and then Andy passed out on stage? What is this? I have yet to hear an explaination, but I have the feeling that the BVB Army probably didn't help his case much.
I didn't start writing this to repremand the BVB Army though, I actually came here to talk about the fandom. Whenever I compare you guys to the Jonas Brothers fans, I do mean well. I know most people don't really like the Jonas Brothers, but I was one of those obessive fans. The ones that know everything there is to know, bawl when they see them live, and shows the love with pride. I see a lot of BVB fans acting the same way, and I wanted to make sure you guys knew the road you were heading down. I am actually greatly fighting the obession, I refuse to let myself get that obessed again.
Its fun for a while, but after that, it gets really frustrating. With the Jonas Brothers, its been a six year experience. I was fully obessed for about four of those, knew everything there was to know (border line creepy), bought anything that had their faces on it, or something about them inside of it, and when I finally saw them in concert, I got so excited that I nearly passed out and I did cry several times. Looking back at all of it, its ridiculous! I still fight it from time to time, I defend them whenever someone insults them, get overly excited when I heard something new has happened to them, and go through spurts here and there where all I want to do is listen to them lke an obessed fangirl. Its honestly just a big mess.
I do not want to get that way with BVB, espeically not since I do hope to one day interview them. They seem like awesome people, and honestly, that's the biggest appeal for me. I like their music, but it doesn't speak to me in way other bands like Art Of Dying and Three Days Grace do. They are one of my favorites, but I honestly seem to have more interest in them as people, than I do in their music. I have a feeling that if I let myself get that obessed, I will never be able to interview them, because I'll have a hell of a time trying to talk to them.
I don't get starstruck over most people, they are just normal people, but I've known for years that I would be starstruck with the Jonas Brothers. Considering I got to their show, my mom simply asked me how it felt to know I was finally at a Jonas Brothers concert, and I burst into tears of joy. I get seating and moments before they took the show, I felt like I was going to pass out, from excitment (I only know this because as soon as they got on the stage, I was fine), and when they played my favorite songs back to back, I was in awe I think. I remember half way through "That's Just The Way We Roll" just sitting down and staring, thinking "OMG, I can not believe this is real." I was probably crying then too, but that was two and a half years ago now. Wow, its really been that long.
My family and friends have all agreed, I'd probably embarass myself in front of them. One of my best friends has said that she bets one of two things will happen. Either I'll burst into tears and feel bad, so I stay away from them, or their body guard will have to pry me off of Nick because I would hugtackle him. My mother thinks I'll pass out, then wake up and cry because I passed out, and then cry even more because chances are they'd be right there. I don't like that about myself . Its a dream of mine to interview them one day, though it'd probably be the toughest interview they ever do because I have the hardest questions ever for them. Like I said, I know a lot, so the questions I have, are the things nobody has ever gotten them to admit. In 2008, I was named their 'Super Fan' because at the time I had every CD that was out, several t-shirts, hats, purses, and two websites just for them.
The websites though were a bit different, the one can still be found actually. One was called Jonas Heaven, and all it was was actually just JB facts. You name it, I had it. It was sort of scary. Plus I had a graphics site called OJD Graphics, but it changed to something else later one. I forget what I renamed it now, it may have been Immortal Graphics, now that I think of it.
Anyways, I went to a contest that was hosted by a local radio station to win JB tickets, and my mom was talking to the DJ about how obessed I was, he heard all that and was like, "Oh wow, you're like the Super Fan or something." I probably should not be proud of it, but in a way I am. I now hide it fairly well, now you don't hear me mention them every day, but it still comes out. It never ends.
Maybe the BVB fans don't care, but I'm just letting you know where its probably headed for a lot of you.
I didn't start writing this to repremand the BVB Army though, I actually came here to talk about the fandom. Whenever I compare you guys to the Jonas Brothers fans, I do mean well. I know most people don't really like the Jonas Brothers, but I was one of those obessive fans. The ones that know everything there is to know, bawl when they see them live, and shows the love with pride. I see a lot of BVB fans acting the same way, and I wanted to make sure you guys knew the road you were heading down. I am actually greatly fighting the obession, I refuse to let myself get that obessed again.
Its fun for a while, but after that, it gets really frustrating. With the Jonas Brothers, its been a six year experience. I was fully obessed for about four of those, knew everything there was to know (border line creepy), bought anything that had their faces on it, or something about them inside of it, and when I finally saw them in concert, I got so excited that I nearly passed out and I did cry several times. Looking back at all of it, its ridiculous! I still fight it from time to time, I defend them whenever someone insults them, get overly excited when I heard something new has happened to them, and go through spurts here and there where all I want to do is listen to them lke an obessed fangirl. Its honestly just a big mess.
I do not want to get that way with BVB, espeically not since I do hope to one day interview them. They seem like awesome people, and honestly, that's the biggest appeal for me. I like their music, but it doesn't speak to me in way other bands like Art Of Dying and Three Days Grace do. They are one of my favorites, but I honestly seem to have more interest in them as people, than I do in their music. I have a feeling that if I let myself get that obessed, I will never be able to interview them, because I'll have a hell of a time trying to talk to them.
I don't get starstruck over most people, they are just normal people, but I've known for years that I would be starstruck with the Jonas Brothers. Considering I got to their show, my mom simply asked me how it felt to know I was finally at a Jonas Brothers concert, and I burst into tears of joy. I get seating and moments before they took the show, I felt like I was going to pass out, from excitment (I only know this because as soon as they got on the stage, I was fine), and when they played my favorite songs back to back, I was in awe I think. I remember half way through "That's Just The Way We Roll" just sitting down and staring, thinking "OMG, I can not believe this is real." I was probably crying then too, but that was two and a half years ago now. Wow, its really been that long.
My family and friends have all agreed, I'd probably embarass myself in front of them. One of my best friends has said that she bets one of two things will happen. Either I'll burst into tears and feel bad, so I stay away from them, or their body guard will have to pry me off of Nick because I would hugtackle him. My mother thinks I'll pass out, then wake up and cry because I passed out, and then cry even more because chances are they'd be right there. I don't like that about myself . Its a dream of mine to interview them one day, though it'd probably be the toughest interview they ever do because I have the hardest questions ever for them. Like I said, I know a lot, so the questions I have, are the things nobody has ever gotten them to admit. In 2008, I was named their 'Super Fan' because at the time I had every CD that was out, several t-shirts, hats, purses, and two websites just for them.
The websites though were a bit different, the one can still be found actually. One was called Jonas Heaven, and all it was was actually just JB facts. You name it, I had it. It was sort of scary. Plus I had a graphics site called OJD Graphics, but it changed to something else later one. I forget what I renamed it now, it may have been Immortal Graphics, now that I think of it.
Anyways, I went to a contest that was hosted by a local radio station to win JB tickets, and my mom was talking to the DJ about how obessed I was, he heard all that and was like, "Oh wow, you're like the Super Fan or something." I probably should not be proud of it, but in a way I am. I now hide it fairly well, now you don't hear me mention them every day, but it still comes out. It never ends.
Maybe the BVB fans don't care, but I'm just letting you know where its probably headed for a lot of you.
Sunday, January 15, 2012
I have so many dreams
I used to laugh at my friend because she's have all these goals and dreams for herself that were totally irrelevant to one another. I told her several times that while they're great dreams to have, there's too much that goes into them all for her to be able to do all of it. Now however, I keep thinking of everything I'd want to do, though in a way they all do go together.
Not only do I want to be a music journalist who writes about music, reviews music and most importantly, interviews the musicians, but I also have this dream of designing my own band shirts. I've always made lyric graphics, and when I was younger I actually did make t-shirts and things like that. They were never very good, as I used the puffy paint and I was only maybe tweleve,but I still tried.
One of these days, though I'm not sure when that may be, I hope to make my own T-shirts. All would be for these bands, or Immortal Music, and I'm thinking a lot of the band shirts will have lyrics all down the back. I don't know why, it just seems like a cool idea to me. I got the idea after I saw what I believe was an Escape The Fate shirt with various lyrics all over it. Plus, lyrics are the biggest part of music, so why not have it displayed on your clothing? That's just my thinking anyways.
Its a random idea, that I may try to pursue soon. I have a friend who runs a clothing company, so I may ask him if he could help bring one of my ideas to life. :)
Not only do I want to be a music journalist who writes about music, reviews music and most importantly, interviews the musicians, but I also have this dream of designing my own band shirts. I've always made lyric graphics, and when I was younger I actually did make t-shirts and things like that. They were never very good, as I used the puffy paint and I was only maybe tweleve,but I still tried.
One of these days, though I'm not sure when that may be, I hope to make my own T-shirts. All would be for these bands, or Immortal Music, and I'm thinking a lot of the band shirts will have lyrics all down the back. I don't know why, it just seems like a cool idea to me. I got the idea after I saw what I believe was an Escape The Fate shirt with various lyrics all over it. Plus, lyrics are the biggest part of music, so why not have it displayed on your clothing? That's just my thinking anyways.
Its a random idea, that I may try to pursue soon. I have a friend who runs a clothing company, so I may ask him if he could help bring one of my ideas to life. :)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)