This is life.

I leave home in about two weeks, I've known that for a while, so why is it just now really hitting me? My family will be moving to a new house, without me, and I am leaving the only state I've ever lived in before. As I was packing up some stuff to make it easier on my family once I'm gone, it just hit me how truly scary that thought is.

    I suppose I shouldn't be frightened, should I? Its just the way life goes, and we know that from the time we are all small children. Now I'm starting to understand what my mother is talking about. Her baby is grown up now, and is leaving her. I'm sorto f scared to leave now that that thought has hit me. I'm not saying I'm not going, so don't think like that, I'm simply saying it just hit me like a ton of bricks.

        What didn't help is my brother asked me if they could turn my room into a game room while I'm away. Not cool, man, not cool. A lot of you out there are probably thinking, "God, what a baby! How old are you?" A lot of you might be out on your own, or just can't wait to get out, but I guess its different with me.

             I've been home more often than not for the last nine years, when you're homeschooled that happens a lot. You see more of your kitchen table, and computer desk than you do the outsdie world. That doesn't nessicairly mean I was sheltered, it simply means I've always been home. I've also never been out of the state before for so long, or without my mother there. The last time I left Florida, I was only eight years old, and we were taking my great grandparents to Indiana, where they still live. That was ten years ago, so its sort of a shock to realize what I'm doing.

      I've talked about this before, and I can assure you that you have not heard the last about this. Expect more blogs much like this one once I'm up there, simply saying how things are going, and how much I miss my home. That'll change, I'm fairly certain with time that'll become my home. I'd suppose it'd have to, since I'm spending six months up there.

   I just come here to vent, I guess. I don't want to go crying to my mother, as she's already been highly upset over this. I just need to get it off my chest in a way that I see fit. This way too, I don't need to bother anyone, I can feel like I'm actually venting without anyone really listening. I still don't know if more than two people read my blog, and part of me for now doesn't get. Its pretty much my online diary, so who cares if people read it? I don't know, I guess I'll be ok, it'll just take a little while to not only get used to the idea, but get used to it being reality.

   I think that's the thing, we've been planning this for so long without any results, it just always felt more like a dream. Something that's fun to think about, but will never really happen. Now that I know its a reality, its a whole new concept.